Kitten’s Mewlings

Triple Tryst
Two on one are not fair odds,
But this is not a fight -
It is a dance.
A triple person tango,
Wrapped in black silk and lace,
One and one and one,
Tangled sensually, bound by touch.

Mouths lock on skin,
Teeth nip at flesh,
Fingers clasp, nails dig in.
Three become one,
Inseparable in the night.
One claims two,
Two claim one.

~by me

Recently I have been having issues with my current relationship. Not bad issues, no, we do not argue, we do not fight, we are not in danger of breaking up. Then what kind of issues you ask? Well, see, there is this other woman….

Every party and dinner I host, I have at least one person tell me, out of earshot of the rest of the guests, that one woman in particular is looking at my man with eyes that should only be reserved for the one dating him. I play naive and ask what they think I should do, how I should approach the issue, and listen intently to their advice. Oh how little they know….

You see, this other woman has become a fun component in my solid relationship with Big Ed. From my point of view, she has earned the right to look at him that way.

It started with small glances. She would come visit late hours, after her children were placated and fed, and she would stay until the early morning. Drinks would be mixed, and while I would usually go to bed around ten or eleven, she and my boyfriend would stay up watching random BBC shows, talk about the joys of working in different buildings and departments at the same company, and whatnot. She was worried at first about pissing me off; pillows would always be piled between her and him on the couch, even when I was in the room, creating a small wall that would seem endless with the more she drank.

Then one night, I somehow managed to stay awake until after she left. That was the night she had enough liquor in her system to get up the nerve to ask me if she could borrow him. She is divorced, her oldest of two daughters is a year younger than I, she has one unsteady (read: barely there) fuck-buddy, and has had no release in weeks. I giggled and let her know I’d think about it. If only she knew what thoughts had been going through my head all night!

You see, I have had the pleasure of being the center of attention in a three-way, where I was the only female, but never have I had the pleasure of joining alongside another woman in an attempt to spoil my boyfriend. She elicited such thoughts in my head, but it was not in me to admit to this quite yet. I played it out, teasing and taunting my boyfriend with thoughts of what could happen. When he pushed a date one night after work, I hesitatingly agreed. This, from me at least, is normal - I need a little nudge now and then, and especially with this. I was excited. I was nervous. My nerves overrode the excitement. A little vodka can do wonders to calm nerves. And an exhibitionist boyfriend can help a lot as well.

The first time was incredible. The quickie that it was (she had a deadline to go pick up her daughter from a volleyball game) started before she arrived. I needed something to do to help the vodka get my mind off the nerves, so Big Ed, sitting in his over sized, nearly love-seat sized chair, with his legs up on the massive ottoman) pulled me on top of him. I was still fully clothed, he was still in his workout shorts and tank. He ran his hands through my hair, whispering reassurances to me, kissing me gently, and asking again if I was sure about this. I cracked a joke (a bad habit I picked up from my ex) and made mention of the last time I was part of an attempt at this kind of thing (the girlfriend freaked out and yelled and cried hysterically). I brought up a point he had not thought of, and it sobered him up a bit, made him nervous for a change. It was my turn to calm him down - Had I ever freaked out over anything? Have I ever given cause to think I may be that fragile? More kisses followed, and soon the bra had to come out from under the shirt. The first orgasm of many was the next thing on the list. Big Ed enjoys the fact that he can get me off so easily.

Not even five minutes later, while I was still atop Big Ed, straddling and kissing, the lady in question knocked on the door. We shall call her Willow - it is such a pretty name and bears no resemblance to the real name, but does bear a striking resemblance to her body type: tall and thin and graceful (though realistically she is quite prone to accidents and spills…not really all that graceful…like me!). I was recovering from my orgasm, so Big Ed said hello and prompted me to do the same. Big Ed is such a playful guy, he really helped break any tension by getting straight to the point, "Willow, she’s already one up on you! Would you like to even the score?" I rolled off, sat on the floor, and let her straddle him and come the same way I had.

I had not told him of the rules. I had parameters set in my head, but had not been able to sort through them, and when he had asked before, I simply told him that I would be clear if something was about to happen that I did not want happening. This left a lot open to his imagination and bought me time to sort through how far I was willing to let this go. Seemed fair to me.

Once we were all comfortable and us ladies had been relaxed a little at the hands of Big Ed, Willow and I traded off straddling him and rubbing his back with our bare chests.

Oh dear, I seemed to have skipped a space! In the course of swapping positions, Big Ed coaxed me out of my shirt, and Willow followed lead. While I, still in jeans, rode his still covered cock, Willow crawled up behind him and started rubbing his back and head with her nails. We both decided he should join us, and there we sat, all three of us topless. There, we are now back on track!

There was much timid exploring on my part, but with Willow’s ‘out there’ attitude, her explorations were much more demanding. For one on the outside, it would not appear this was her first time as well, would it?

Time draws fuzzy at this point. How long we swapped places, getting off, and teasing Big Ed…It could not have been long, but it was quite a few orgasms for both of us.

Willow and I then decided it was his turn, to which he objected. It seems he was having more than enough fun seeing us squirm and get off. We promised not to be gentle, but only if he would take his shorts off. I let Willow get acquainted with her new toy while I leaned up and kissed my boyfriend. Oh the look in his eyes!

She and I switched every few minutes, varying the techniques, speeds, pressures, sensations. We weren’t aiming to get him off quite yet, we wanted to drag out as much pleasure as possible in our limited time slot.

Willow’s daughter called, breaking the moment. Not too much of a break, though. We were then coaxed out of our jeans and panties and instructed to sit side-by-side on the couch. To be honest, I’m not a big fan of cunnilingus; it has more to do with not really being used to it because my ex, a boyfriend of nearly four years, refused to do it. Big Ed is slowly working me over and helping me, mainly because it is one of his most favorite acts. And here he had two women, very very wet, propped up on the couch in front of him - what more could he ask for?

Willow is a dry crier. When she comes, she whimpers, curls, and makes short crying sounds. Compared to my violent screaming spasms, I am sure Big Ed preferred going down on her. She had quite a questioning look on her face when he switched from her to me. With her, his face was buried and both his hands were traveling between me and her breasts, but when he moved over to me, both his arms were circling my thighs. Why, might you ask? Did you not read "violent screaming spasms"? On various occasions I have nearly suffocated him, and once, very nearly snapped his neck. I may be small and compact, but I have thighs of steel. Hearing the explanation, Willow smiled knowingly and once he started, she let her hands and mouth wander for him. After a few small orgasms, Big Ed was not satisfied, and began biting on my inner thighs. I have never had a more explosive orgasm! I vaguely remember almost nothing other than the swirling colors that overtook the room.

When I came to, my legs were quite weak. So weak, they wouldn’t move. That signals a wonderful time has been had. I was asked if it would be alright for him to actually fuck her. Little did they know I had already imagined that and the thought excited me quite a bit. While still limply lying on the couch, I watched her climb atop him in his chair. I love my uber comfy furniture! Every piece is just big enough to be a small bed! Big Ed, however, had drooped a little while working us over. I was asked if I could move just enough to come over and help him up. Have you ever tried crawling across a room when your legs are very nearly nonexistent? It seemed to take forever! But the reward at the end of the long journey…!

I love sucking cock. I will get that out in the open right now. I’m not very good at it (at least I think so), but I love it, and I firmly believe that until my experience and expertise increases, my love and joy and enthusiasm will help hide a few of my faults. And sometimes, it helps to have a small-ish mouth. With my mouth, tongue, and fingernails at work, and with Willow getting off on his hand while kissing her, it didn’t take too long to get a rise out of him. I was a little reluctant to move, but when I did, I only went so far as the arm of the chair. Mmmm, I had a great view of her face, his face, and I could drag my nails up and down his chest. She enjoyed a few wonderful orgasms (and the back cushion on the chair shows it with new creases where her hands balled into fists). After she was well taken care of, and after another few missed phone calls, and after a quick glance at a watch, it was decided it was time for the treat.

I like to think of myself as a great hostess. And as hostess for the evening, I had already promised Willow the chance to swallow Big Ed’s load, should she want to. She was shocked but readily accepted. The only problem was, Big Ed had gone a little limp again, seems disuse had gotten the better of him again (she had gotten up to walk across the room to get her phone, again). Big Ed never has such a problem, so I threw the explanation under nerves. Yes he had two beautiful women at his disposal, but I’m sure he was just waiting for me to freak out, and he may have also been dreading the minutes to hours after Willow left - he does not like it when women friends in his life do not like each other, and I am quite sure he was worried about how I would feel afterwards.

I was asked to wake him up again while Willow looked around the room for her clothes. I have never tasted anyone on my boyfriend’s cock except me, so I was curious how I would react; would I love it? Would I hate it? Would I freak out? OMG she was sweet! I cannot describe how sweet! It was like sucking down a hunk of sausage that had been dipped in a tropical syrup that had been mixed with a lot of powdered sugar, but still even sweeter than that! Again, I was reluctant to move, but shifted out of the way only after she had her clothes on and I had licked her juices clean off of him. Big Ed then took over, pumping himself to orgasm, with her mouth hovering over his hand, anticipating the treat, while her hands drug her nails up his thighs, while my mouth locked on his neck, and while my nails raked across his chest.

It was almost too much for him. He orgasmed, but he did not come. It was a long orgasm, almost as long as mine or Willow’s. A dazed and heavenly look overtook his face, his entire body pulsed and convulsed. Willow and I simply smiled at him, happy to have worked him over. I was a little disappointed Willow had not gotten her treat, so was Big Ed - when he could talk without stuttering again. She kept saying not to worry about it, but I am sure she was disappointed at least a little, too.

We all kissed and said our goodbyes, her all dressed, grabbing her phone and purse, while Big Ed and I still sprawled naked on the chair. Big Ed pulled me to him, softly kissed me, and told me again how I had earned massive good girlfriend points, putting me at or above "greatest girlfriend ever". I curled into him, rested my head on his shoulders, and purred. It may have been a silent purr, audible only to my own mind, but it was a purr nonetheless! Again, he voiced his concern for not giving Willow the treat she deserved, to which I replied: "Don’t worry about it. She’ll get it next time."

{} SubmissiveKitten {}

This weekend was Serenity’s Coming Home Party. She came home Tuesday, but the relatives showed and fawned Saturday, then she went out for the first time and visited my Aunt in Dallas for Sunday BBQ.

None of her father’s relatives, just the sane group known as my side.

I convinced Big Ed to show up with me to the BBQ. We were late, had to wait for his happy ass to jump in the shower. So we arrived about ten minutes before my folks split. The only reason they hadn’t already left was because LittleOne had stayed the night with me and they had to pick her up.

My Aunt is a hoot. Ya catch her at the right time…. Let’s just say she was wild before she married, I’ve heard stories, and she’s trying to reach out to me when no one is looking.

One comment she made before we left still kinda sticking to me. She told me she’s glad to’ve met Big Ed, says she’s never seen me with a man before. And considering she’s seen me with my ex, who is now enjoying a new pastime, I agree with her.

Wednesday was terrible.

All I will say is that we had a great guy quit because of all the shit thrown at us drafters.

Actually, it was a bunch of shit thrown at me and him. Not that kinda shit, rumors like that fly about all the employees at least once. It’s a thrill when they turn out to be right (meaning the people get irritated and complain; innocent people just don’t do that). No, it was rediculous shit involving every single supervisor above me, including the president of the company himself. This guy quit just before the public ass chewing, which I had to endure alone. Fun, no?

I was even trying to have a good day, too; I mean, I was doing my best to feel sexy, which meant I was actually wearing eyeliner and lipstick (that’s how you know I’m really not feeling like I look good…I pull out the lipstick). I was also wearing my white shirt. Yup, the lovely little top that I love. Along with my collar and the bunny

Yup yup. I think that is the ONLY thing I like about this place; they let you dress in your own style, so long as it’s not insanely immodest or overly obscene. Me? I only have the collar and the bunny. And my shirts. There’s this other guy…yikes…that’s all I’m gonna say.

This weekend was full of events AND posts.

Please feel free to catch up:

Friday: Diamonds

Saturday: Thoughts

Sunday: Serenity Leigh

I am disappointed.
I am envious.
I am hurt.
I am jealous.
But most of all, I am proud.

I am disappointed in your choices so far, envious of the new life you have created, hurt by your pushing me away, jealous of the family you have now started, and proud to be your sister. Never, not in my wildest dreams, would I have ever expected you to be fearless going into battle, and not even cringe when the contractions went from many so close to one continuous spasm.

Even after 30+ hrs of lack of sleep, I am not easily impressed, but you have done so. And she is gorgeous, although she more resembles her father than you, she has your toes (giggle). She has potential, I hope you rear her well.

Yes, folks, my sister had the baby. She had basically continuous contractions since roughly Saturday about 5pm, and when they got rather constant, and about four minutes apart, they left to the hospital…at 11:30pm. They checked in just as I was calling–I figured something was up and wanted to know if all was ok. 40minutes later I was pulling into the parkinglot (40minute drive from my apt to the hospital while doing 80 down the highway and getting lucky and falling in behind a cop doing 70 in a 50…). While she slept fitfully from a muscle relaxer, I huddled in the room’s unpadded wood glider, my mom stuffed herself in the pukey-floral half-couch, and the daddy lay fast asleep on a quickly assembled cot (after my mom and I basically pushed him away from my sister). I couldn’t sleep, I sat and listened to the baby’s heartbeat on the moniter and watched the machine graph her contractions. That is kinda lulling, but every time I was even remotely close to passing out, the heart-rate would change or there would be some beeping from the machine (like….ran out of paper….gawd that was loud!). The nurse checked in every hour, checked her dialation every two, and at four, they booked her and checked her into the hospital…originally they figured she’d be out and home in an hour or so, but after nothing but continuous contractions and another slight change in dialation….

She eventually caved and had the epideral. Not because it hurt so much, but because the pain was so constant that she couldn’t sit still, she was squirming and the pain-stuff they’d pumped her with didn’t do a damn thing…and basically she was maxed out on the stuff. Oh how she slept! The daddy used that time to retreat and call up friends and family.

OH! My new in-laws…..oooooooooohhhhhhhh boy! Yikes. Let’s say white-trash, plus plastic surgery, plus a diva complex, plus sick drunken stories. THAT was the waiting room before we called into the delivery room to listen in. *Shiver* I think I’m going to refuse any invitiations to that side of the family reunion….sorry sis, but DAMN!

But I should get back, no? By two in the afternoon, she’s barely dialated, but fully efaced, or so the nurse says. To hell with it, I have a 45minute drive (meaning I won’t be flying at 80 down the highway home) ahead of me and I’ve been awake since roughly 7 or so the day before. Sure I’ve pulled all-nighters before, but given that the last one was with the aid of a fianced couple, 1/2 bottle Jack, and 1/3 bottle vodka (all me), I wasn’t lasting quite so well this time around. If I got any sleep at all, it was in 5min incremants that can’t be called sleep. So I made up my mind; either the baby would be here soon and I could go home guilt free, or I’d leave at 4pm no matter what and see the baby Monday after work.

I left at 3:15pm for a 5minute run to Braum’s just down the road, she’s sitting at 6 and just waking up to be checked again. I get back about 3:20pm or so and get a phone call as I’m walking to the elevator "We’re getting ready to push!" Whaaaaa–???!!!??!!!!

At 3:48pm, Serenity Leigh officially joined the world. She was barely bigger than I was when I was born! But she weighed a few ounces less. 6lbs, 10oz, 19 3/4" long. She has her daddy’s hair style and color, daddy’s chin, daddy’s upper lip, mama’s amount of hair, mama’s nose, and mama’s toes. I told myself I wouldn’t cry, not with a million people milling about. Serenity is the only one to see my tears as I welcomed her to this world and talked to her. Hugging the daddy gave me an excuse to hide my face long enough for them to fade, and then I hugged everyone and left. I’m an aunt again! And my mother is now officially a grandmother, and this time not by a step-daughter.

If you care to notice, I’ve been sprucing the place up a bit here and there. My mile-long link list is steadily getting groomed and there’s a new little "profile" in the "profile-section".

Aside from that and being dangerously dizzy and ill from the medications said to cure my throat, I’ve been sleeping. Yup. Call me up and you wake me. Not something smart.

Well, when I’m up, I’m running around in as little clothing as possible. I’m rather in tune with my anscestrial ways and prefer bare feet and minimal cloth. Afterall, it *is* summer in Texas; skimpy is the norm. Right? Or am I the only one?

Well, since I’m rather top heavy, I do need *some* support. I can’t ALWAYS run nude around the apartment (but I try). So today’s HNT is a sight you’d see if you could see me typing this post right now. A wonderful sight with a subtle shot at my bra. (that would be the top of the right breast as viewed from the left side…got that?)

And no, I did nothing funny with the angle of the camera or photo. That is taken exactly perfectly horizontal.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I am off to sleep off this horrendous headache, plot my doctor’s demise and wish I were born a male.

It’s a sad day when a little girl asks you to sell her puppy.

Well, my little sister is wanting to get rid of Savannah, her 4 month old pup.

We were told she would be 1/2 golden retriever and 1/2 blue heeler, but we were lied to. She’s at the very least a german shephard mix.

She’s too much of a puppy. She’s too dominant over my little sister and she’s too playful for my dad’s patience. So, she must go.

Sad, yes.

She’s a gorgeous pup. She just needs a little obedience schooling and lots of love. Maybe another pup to play with? She tries to play with my mother’s cat (who hates all other animals) and she chases birds and tries to catch them mid-air.

She’s addicted to the pool. She tries to ride on floaties, but when they are removed, she bites them. We’re trying to fix this. She also doesn’t like when people swim underwater in the pool; her instincts are to bark and to try to pull the swimmer out of the water. Not a bad instinct, but it makes it rather difficult to swim with her around.

She’s had her first set of shots, overdue on her second (will have them soon).

Our vet refuses to fix her until she’s older.

Quirks:
- I’ve already mentioned the pool, right?
- She collects sticks. When she was allowed free reign in and out of the house, she brought sticks in and hid them under the couch. Even tried a log from the fire-bin outside.
- She did carry a blanket with her everywhere, but it became tattered and trashed (bad daddy!).
- She has a thing for towels. I suspect it is because she now has no blanket to carry with her.
- She thinks she’s a lapdog. It’s cute now, but when/if she gets bigger….
- She once found a dead baby bird in the backyard. She brought it to the back door and barked insanely until my dad disposed of it. Apparently it didn’t belong.
- She chews rocks. She digs them up and carries them everywhere. Be warned.
- She chews bushes. In process of trying to break her of this.
- She jumps and tries to chew tree limbs. Suspected bird hunting; she only does it when birds are in said tree. Again, trying to break her of this.
- She hates sqeeky toys. She has effectively hidden the two squeaky toys bought (a rubber sqeaky stick and the squeaky green thing pictured below). They have not been seen since she hid them two and a half months or so ago.

I would love to give her up as free, but I didn’t get her completely free. I don’t think she’s pure German Shephard, which would be a pricey sale to be sure. I do know she’s at the very least part Shephard.

If anyone is interested, ESPECIALLY IN THE DALLAS/FORT WORTH AREA, please email me or leave a comment.

Her price is $250. (I’m willing to negotiate)

Savannah roughly 2 1/2 months old, playing with Big Ed

Savannah as of July 23, 2006. Wet from playing in the pool and carrying a stick.

I’m late,
I’m late,
For a very important date.
No time to say "Hello."
Goodbye.
I’m late,
I’m late,
I’m late.

Yikes! I almost went all day Thursday not realizing it was Thursday! Perhaps because work was odd today. But then again it was the same. Contradictions at it’s best unless you were there to understand. *sigh*

So, today’s HNT was taken at work a few weeks ago. MmmmHmmm. We have a daily ice-cream man. He sells ice-cream to the production workers at $1 for anything in his push-cart. So, I sweet talk one of the guys into running out and getting me a FudgeBomb. They’re great.

Was watching Criminal Minds earlier and I had an idea for my HNT. See, I did this a LONG time ago, and it was fun. It’s more fun with cutting and pasting, but when photoshop is at hand…..it’s just tedious! *sigh*

FINALLY it turned out right. Enjoy my two photo collage. Later I will post the two shots I used, both taken with my phone (bad quality).

Big Dick is remodeling his master bed & bath. While doing so, he requested his followers readers to post a pic of their ’shitter’.

I consider this task complete. However, it may not be exactly what he wanted, it’s what I found upon entering the bathroom to take said photo.

I even marked the blur of grey cat fur for you.

[EDIT - THIS IS PARTIALLY STRICTLY A TRIPLEL POST]

As you can see, I’ve changed the look of my blog again. That last background was wonderful, but too many complaints led to me mirroring it to make it a little more readable, but it wasn’t working for me.

So I took a little free shopping spree on over at Se7en’s freebies page. I had to pick between this one and the "pink scrolls". This one just fit better.

When I showed Big Ed my new page, he got slightly jealous, then excited and asked where I got the layout. When I showed him, he found one he liked and asked if I could customize it for him. His choice? *giggle* the Forest Faerie layout. As you can see, we took some liberties with that layout. OF COURSE, Se7en still is credited with the layout, all I did was change the color of the lines and exchanged the faerie with travel stuff.

What Big Ed doesn’t know is that I’ve emailed Se7en to request pricing on a custom layout for him. For those of you who don’t know, Se7en runs Blogs Gone Wild, a lovely little page with lots of options (for a price) for those who don’t know a lot about html or customizing their own page. AND, he’s got a summer-time sale going on…wooo!

Ok, maybe I’m doing a little bit of shameless pushing for a friend, but hey, can ya blame me? He’s a great guy, I’ve met him and bought him lunch. And that was BEFORE he fully developed the idea for this little web-based business!

But, yea, new layout here AND over at Big Ed’s place. It was a rather relaxing weekend, even if I’m more broke than I should be and still have to buy my sister’s babyshower gift.

Oh, and I need a new Super Nintendo AC Adapter…know where I can get one? Nintendorepairshop.com is a possibility, but I want it NOW, not in a few days/weeks. How’m I supposed to play my Star Wars games? Yea, so I talked my brother out of the systems and the games (hell, he only plays that multi-player online playstation crap anyway…I like it older school…like THE Nintendo and the Super Nintendo…too young for Atari, but I have one…it doesn’t work though). Now I just gotta talk Big Ed into letting me hook ‘em up to the tv….He doesn’t believe in tv game consoles; insists on PC gaming. It’s not about the GAME, it’s about the FUN. You can’t replicate the feeling of plugging in all the cords, unravelling the controllers, playing with the RF Switch with a loose wire, and enjoying hours of thumb-numbing games.

Well, I best go to sleep; big day of fighting with The Bitch at work tomorrow. *rolls eyes*

I woke this morning not realizing it was Thursday. My tip off? Big Ed’s HNT! For once, he posted BEFORE me AND I didn’t have to bug him either!

Well, I had my HNT picture chosen this past weekend. I did a few shots of me with my camera while at a few red-lights on the way home last Friday and chose my favorite for today.

This shot was actually taken while waiting my turn at drive-up banking.

This HNT is named for the collar and seatbelt, both of which are forms of containment: the seatbelt for obvious reasons, and the collar contains my sexual being solely for my "owner" (boyfriend).

I love the braids. That’s what I’m doing again today, too. Big Ed loves toying with them and the people at work get a kick out of tugging them. So, you see, fun all around, and with Big Ed to come home to? *SMILE*WINK*

( And for those of you who complain I never write anymore, one post back is the first story in months. Enjoy )

It’s my day off and I can’t sleep in. I’m just not programmed for it. Years of waking at five regardless of the day or event. So, before I search for a local dentist office*, I figured I’d blog a bit. And tell a story. It has been too long.

Day Off

Lindsay’s alarm screeched into the dark silence. She groaned and opened her eyes, glaring at the ceiling. She had forgotten to turn the damn thing off last night; today was her day off work, she didn’t need to be awake for another two hours at least. Grudgingly she crawled out of bed and stumbled across the room, a trick she had learned to wake her up in college when she had to turn off her roommate’s alarm when she was nowhere to be found. After getting up and walking, she could never fall back asleep, which annoyed her this morning; she’d only gotten two hours of sleep.

The night before she had attended her sister’s bachelorette party, held unceremoniously a week before the wedding. They’d gone out dancing at the local Country dance hall, Tombstone Torri’s. Torri, the owner, was due to stop by later in the day to help finalize plans on the reception with Lindsay and Laura. Lindsay was supposed to pick up her sister by one so the three of them could decide before Laura needed to be at the airport for her departure flight from Montana to Texas to see her fiance. Who knew that being states apart was the best way to find a man?

When her thoughts turned to men, Lindsay looked toward her bed. Lying still ensconced in the blankets was the memory of her fiance. The perfect man, at least in her eyes. She blamed herself for his death years ago, still unable to forgive herself, and still unable to invite another man to her bed. Nobody understood, insisting she dance with every available male the night before. Dancing the night away had been wonderful, but it was lonely.

In the end, after a few dozen drinks, she turned down every invitation and went to bed alone. Now those drink were turning on her, as they do every morning after; her head was splitting with a lovely hangover migrane. If the alarm had been off, it wouldn’t have hit quite just yet. Groaning, she stumbled back to bed and crawled under the covers, desperate to drown in her memories once more.

She rolled onto her side and curled up against the memory of Seth, only to find the memory wasn’t a memory; there was an unclothed man sprawled across her dead lover’s side of the bed. Before she could react, he woke from a feigned sleep and covered her mouth and pinned her down. First the alarm, then the hangover, now this; NOT my morning!

Unable to struggle, knowing that screaming would do no good, Lindsay went as limp as she could and stared wide-eyed at the intruder. In the dark, he looked fierce, but there was something about his face…she’d seen him before, but she couldn’t say where. Damnit! Why’d I have so much to drink?! I can’t think! His features were smudged in the early morning darkness, but high cheekbones were obvious. His eyes were impossibly black and mesmirizing.

"My dear, please do not tell me you have already forgotten me! I leave for two weeks and you treat me like a complete stranger!" His voice was deep and rich and wrapped around her like a comforting security blanket. The fear in her eyes fought with relief. His hand, thick with the scent of the forest and fresh air, slowly slid from her mouth. Trembling, she pulled one arm free and ran her hand down his cheek. It can’t be…

"…S-s-seth?"

"Lindsay, honey, you are acting like you have just seen a ghost! I have only been gone two weeks!" Impossible! she thought, I saw you die! How..? Mind muddled, her astonishment showed through her face. She pulled her other arm free and cradled his face with both hands. A glint caught her eye. Her engagement ring shone in the darkness. She hadn’t worn it since that last hospital visit. Tears filled her eyes as she stared at his face. All the guilt she had locked away over his death surfaced and escaped through the liquid streaming down her cheeks.

"Shh, baby, don’t cry" he whispered as he leaned down to kiss her. His lips tasted just as she remembered, but different somehow. The taste of the earth, the taste of him, the taste of her on his tongue, all familiar and true to Seth, but there was something else. The slight scent of honey? Yes, there it was, just the tip of his lips brushed with honey. It wasn’t a sticky honey, like the sugary food, it was the skin itself; it was him.

She froze. This wasn’t Seth. Seth was dead. Her lips parted for a scream that never came; his hand was suddenly covering again, the scent of honey clear in her mind. Pinned once again, she struggled frantically.

"Be still! Darling, what’s wrong?" He whispered in her ear. Unable to scream, desperate to get him to remove his hand, she bit hard on his fingers. His muffled curses preceded a sharp slap across her face. She lay still once more, glaring at him in the dark.

"You….You’re not Seth!" She spit at him, breath coming fast. A sneer as a response to her accusation drove fear back into her eyes, bringing a gasp out of her throat.

"No, I am not. And you, my dear," he shifted atop her, "are a murderer. You killed Seth, and now you shall pay." She suddenly realized her struggling had worked him up, something she was surprised she hadn’t noticed before, mainly because it was quite painfully obvious as he throbbed, large and thick, against her stomach. "That’s it, tremble for me."

"Wh-who are you?" She asked, voice quite small with her fear.

"Do you not remember me? Or did you really only have eyes for Seth?" He shifted again, beginning to part her legs, not a difficult task for someone as muscular and big as he. "That first and only dinner you attended, hanging all over Seth, he introduced you to us all. Did you really forget he had a twin?" Grunting with the effort of holding himself up, Shawn sneered down at her wide-eyed face. He held both her hands with one of his, and slid the engagement ring off her finger, "You never deserved this," and tossed it across the room. "Seth never saw it coming." Slowly he lowered himself, as he entered her, he whispered "Now, you pay."

Her pain tried to fly out in a scream, but that scream was stopped by his mouth covering hers. He began pumping slow, nibbling her lower lip in time with his hips, using his free hand to caress her skin. Her body betrayed her and she moaned. The trembling faded from fear to excitement. She no longer fought, caving in and giving her craving body what it had been denied. It wasn’t Seth, but it was the closest she’d ever come again.

Shawn couldn’t understand her sudden change, it was supposed to be payment for killing his brother, not something she should enjoy! He pulled his mouth away and angrily pushed into her on his next thrust. Her shock and gasp was satisfying to his ear and he repeated the thrust. His hand squeezed tighter around her wrists, his nails bit into her tender breasts. Lindsay whimpered, the fear back in her eyes, but she was unable to control her body. Shawn sneered once more as he bent down to nuzzle her neck, biting none too gently. She cried out, fighting to regain control of herself, pulling at her captive hands, her hips still lost to their attempt to meld into his body.

Lindsay’s regained attempts to free herself hightened Shawn’s desire, driving him harder and faster into her. She screamed out from the pain and realization that he had no intentions of letting up now. Sobs fell from her lips as she bagan to beg him to stop, urged on by the feeling of blood dripping down her neck onto the bed.

To her surprise, he suddenly stopped, raising his head, her blood trailing down his chin. With a moan, he threw his head back and pushed as deep inside as he could. With the deepest dread, she realized she could feel his cumming, deep and hot inside her.

She woke up in a sweat, clutching the sheet around her tightly. The clock lit up the room with the red digits, it was only four in the morning; she’d been asleep for an hour. Maybe she shouldn’t've had those last few drinks.

(end)

* I have a tooth literally rotting in place, no pain, nothing, just releasing bits of tooth every so often…happened with all my baby molars when they were ready to fall out, but this isn’t a baby tooth….and before you blame my brushing habits, I will say this: if it is simply a massive cavity, it will be my second ever, and being that it is on the farthest molar, a tooth barely reaching out of my gums, and considering my tiny mouth, with even the smallest toothbrush (trust me, i’ve gone for them), it is a hard to reach tooth. Doc said that I just had some coding in my DNA for the saliva or something that attacked the baby molars as they got ready to fall out; but they never made it to ‘falling out’, they ALL had to be pulled. It is part of my fear of dentists…seems every time I went in, they were pulling…and the needles….so you see my hesitation to hunt one down and blog instead?

EDIT
A quick aside: DINOSAURS IS NOW ON DVD!!!!!!!!!!

I’m a food lover. That’s no secret. I savor every bite, and it is beginning to show. C once made some remark about wishing to come back in his next life as a chunk of food to have me look at him the same way (jackass!).

Earlier tonight I told Big Ed that I was in the mood to go out tonight, but not like the usual outing for food; I asked if he knew of anything small and unusual. After much thinking, he asked how I liked German food. To be honest, I’ve never been to a strictly German restaurant before, which made his mind up instantly. The only problem was he couldn’t remember the name of the place and wasn’t sure if it was still snuggled in the heart of Fort Worth. We made the trip on the faith that it was there, and even if it wasn’t, there’d be plenty of options to choose from.

We arrived and saw the flickering and half-lit sign for Edelweiss Restaurant. One step inside the door and you realize why it is rated #1 in Fort Worth (according to Yahoo!Travel)…it’s something you have to see; it can’t be described. I will admit it was a tad crowded with tables, but only roughly 75% of the seats were filled (though I hear it’s jam-packed Saturday nights). I will also admit that a few of the waitresses (the ones that weren’t older than 25) were complimented quite nicely in their uniforms, one most in particular…. (picture something like this, but a little more waist-hugging and sexy on the long legged waitress).

I was warned before I sat down that the food comes in mass quantities. I was prepared enough, I thought, to be able to munch one slice of bread, nibble the salad, then get to my Hungarian Veal Goulosh. To be honest, I barely made a dent in it when I realized I was full. This NEVER happens to me! But it was just.so.much.food! My plate was a little over a foot wide, oblong, and piled AT LEAST four inches high! My only complaint about the place, no isn’t the portions, it’s the price, but DAMN is it worth it! Roughly $12-$16 a plate, but the doggybag will feed ya a few more meals!

While we enjoyed our expensive meal (our final total, including tip was $60), we were serenaded by the owner himself who came out to sing ‘happy birthday’ and any requests for a young 60-something man and his party. He even did a rendition of Elvis’ Jailhouse Rock (which is one of my favorites), and returned to the stage and faced those of us behind the dance floor…I even got his attention (I think it was my shirt partly, the rest my major smile) and it seemed he was singing TO ME for that brief song…it ended with a wink *giggle*. The "band" stopped playing and allowed him his time (after all, he IS the boss). This band consisted of an accordian player and a keyboardist/singer. They are a treat! And our waitress was a bit of a gossipper, spilling the beans about one woman sitting all alone at a table near the stage — she’s the accordian’s stalker! She, maybe 250lbs, comes by every night and only leaves when the band finishes. Keep in mind, the guy she’s ’stalking’ plays the accordian (alright, I admit, that takes FANCY finger work), is rather on the farther side of fourty (at least), and is no slim-jim himself.

I must also remark on the little "beer tabs" sitting at the table. There were these pieces of business-card-like paper with a triangle perferated in the middle with the appetizer list on one side and the other with this:

Take the triangle and put it, like a bookmark, over the edge of your cup. Viola! They won’t touch your drink while you PEE PEE. *giggle*

Ok, I must be off to bed now; just remember, if you’re ever in the Fort Worth area, I highly recommend this place. After all, I wouldn’t have titled this post "Damn Good Eatin’" for nothin’!

Just a quickie today. Enjoy!

**edit**
Picture relinked; it will work now

*+*+*

Refer to [THIS] post for explination about [THIS] HNT picture.

Life is like a deck of cards.
Ya never know what you’ll be dealt next
And countin’ can get ya kicked out faster.
Beginner’s luck only goes so far,
As everyone finds out sooner or later.
Eventually you’re wise enough to the game
That the money don’t really matter at all,
And you find all bets are off.
Those faithful to the game will earn their winnings,
Albeit sometimes small compared to the outpouring they gave.
Then there are the privelaged few,
Who can sit back with a smile;
They believe they’ve rigged the play,
Expecting big returns.
They would not sit so high
If only they knew the dealer.

Somebody Help Me
I can’t sleep.
You’re not supposed to be here,
But you won’t leave my mind.
It’s like withdrawal from a drug;
I survive awhile just fine,
But it gets worse with each passing day.
What can I do to break this hold on me?
It’s not right for these thoughts to remain,
Memories of your skin hard and smooth and close,
Painfully claw my nerves,
Yet they’d kill to be given into.
I can’t keep up this facade,
But I can’t keep pushing them away.

Pride is an issue with me;
Admitting something is wrong,
Admitting a failure,
Breaking down and crying,
Nothing short of eternal pain could produce these lines from my lips.
Think of that as I fall on my knees and beg,
Beg for anyone, someone, to help me.
Help me push you from my heart,
Rid my mind of these haunting images.
You have no right to linger,
My defenses are failing,
I’m weaker than ever;
Somebody help me.

Emotional Chord:
Faith Hill - Let Me Let Go

Gonna be busy the next few days.

Be back soon.

It is in poor taste to vent any feelings of unrest caused by lack of attention.

Do you not agree?

Therefore, I shall do no such thing.

I shall simply sit here and read a book.

Nevermind the fact that I am somewhat of a comment whore; I don’t mind the loneliness.

Honest.

And this book? Very good.

Addictive, actually.

I warn you, do not begin reading Laurell K. Hamilton’s Anita Blake, Vampire Hunter series.

You will go insane hunting down the next novel when the final page is turned.

You sill likely spend more money than you intend because you went to the bookstore to get the next book and were sidetracked.

Yes, this has happened to me.

And it all began with one book: Guilty Pleasures.

It is a guilty pleasure worth getting.

Might I mention all the vampires, were-animals, and zombie raisings?

There is half of the seventh book left to read.

It is calling my name.

To it, I am not a comment whore, simply a hungry spellbound mind begging for more….

…do not disturb me until you see my nose outside this book!

Let’s go back a few weekends, shall we? I just got my film developed (*gasp* FILM!?!?!) of the fun zoo weekend and Mother’s Day. The zoo was two weekends ago? It doesn’t really matter, because I HAVE PICTURES!

Now, in all fairness, Big Ed doesn’t like his photos shown….so I will show him and me together and then his leg.

Yea, you heard right, now pay attention to the tale!

The Zoo
We went out and about that morning. I felt like shit (damn car sickness…) by the time we finished hunting down yard sales and garage sales and estate sales, but was determined not to ruin our plan — to see the poor innocent caged aminals in the poor recreated outdoor environments at the local animal prison zoo. Big Ed claims he’s all "look at the poor big kitty in the tiny yard" kinda sympathetic and whatnot…claims his exwife refused to take him back to the zoo because of it…. Let me say, I heard not much of that kind of words spewing from his mouth…. Kind of a let down, really…

We got there around one in the afternoon. Walked a LOT. The fresh air rid me of my car sickness (in all honesty, I had thought I’d outgrown it…damn), but my legs were still rather weak and my feet began aching after awhile.

We walked up and down, down and up. The Fort Worth Zoo has this thing going through July 9th…DinoRoars…Robotic dinosaurs hidden among the animals….Figured I’d let LittleOne take pictures of those when she goes later this month, but it was kinda cool (a scavenger hunt for kids–to get them to come to the zoo and see the animals)…

We saw one of my favorites, the zebra. Then we saw my old highschool mascot, the ram. And we also passed by the most laid back dudes ever, the kangaroos!

Had a few pictures of us thrown in there, but none too pretty; it was hot, we were sweaty, and Big Ed just doesn’t like his looks (some bullshit about being too overweight….) so none of those are coming from the zoo. Maybe later

Mother’s Day
We spent Mother’s Day with my family. Partially because his was out of town, partially because I wanted my boyfriend with me (although my family doesn’t know he’s my boyfriend), and partially because it was a fish fry — you just can’t pass up a fish fry!

Before we arrived, my mom told me about a conversation between my brother and my dad:
brother: "So who all is coming today?"
dad: "Your sister and her boyfriend, your uncle and his boys, your grandmother, and Kitten and her….and her….and Big Ed"

*giggle*

So while there, Big Ed met Savannah. I think she likes him, don’t you?

Anyway, this isn’t from mother’s day, but it’s the same outfit I wore…It’s my HNT for this week, from this past weekend at our cookout
Don’t we look good?

I have a laid back office. I also have a minor rant on them to come later.

The office doesn’t require any special dress, it only requests that you dress comfortably and somewhat appropriately.

This isn’t uncommon for me.

**edit** the link doesn’t seem to be working for me, so here is the pic:

The world is going under,
Down, down, down, faster than ever,
Round and round the drain,
Dizzying and mindnumbing the sane;
Give up hope, it is but a lie,
Notice not a single protest cry?
No one notices, just drink the empty cup;
What is up is down, down is up,
Topsy turvy is the way to go,
A rollercoaster never slow,
Politicians whisper in the ear,
Would have you think the end is never near.
The charge is on one and all,
Best to surrender to the fall,
The world is going under.

The plan is to work up the courage and save up the money to get a custom tattoo.

THIS is where I’m gonna get it. Whatcha think? ;P

serenity - a disposition free from stress or emotion

We finally found a name for Smokey.

He came to us as Smokey, how unoriginal is that? He has had the nicknames Spazcat, Spaz, and Scrat, but those aren’t real names.

Brutus fits him.

—

And I know I didn’t do an HNT yesterday; would you if you were still hugging the toilet? I’ll have a double shot next week, to make up for this week.

I know, keep with the wounds theme, but I was terribly ill last night and I couldn’t leave my new best friend (the toilet)….which means I had no time to type.

..Yea, I was sick. Severely. I came home and needed a nap, but I lay in bed for nearly an hour in pain; my stomache was in knots and it didn’t let up until nearly puking every inch of my intestines up.

I would be crying food poisoning from the shrimp I had at lunch, but my stomache was already upset before breakfast. The 24hr tummy bug again? *shiver*

Anyway, y’all came here looking for nekkid me, not some gross story (I know Trash, I got your comment). So I present you with a photoshopped bodypaint picture:

(maybe I love cats too much?)

***CALLOUT: Comment even if you just surf the pictures***

Today’s post is part one of a collection from various people in my life as well as a few true stories. True, this might make it a long post, but I figured installments would do well all around.

My theme is wounds. There are several kind of wounds I would like to cover, so let’s get started, shall we?

COOK WOUNDS
Every good cook has horror stories, and I’m not talking about food gone wrong. A little after I moved in here, my mother sent me a picture text, the body of the message read "This is what happens when a steam bubble explodes on a thumb!" That’s my mother’s latest cook wound. So what’s my story? My first real cook wound! I was four when I learned to make fried taters and five when I got my first wound. I was in charge of stirring the skillet, but the handle was sticking over the stove. Of course I had learned kitchen safety, and one of the main rules is handles DO NOT hang over the edge. Yes, I went to put it where it belonged….and I got burned. Castiron skillets do that, ya know.

Now, before I present you today’s HNT, I feel compelled to forewarn you about the gore of the fresh wound; mine’s simply a highlighted scar: two cook wounds (no, not "cock wounds", that comes later)

Still to come:
-PLAY WOUNDS
-MOVING WOUNDS
-SEX WOUNDS

The Dante’s Inferno Test has banished you to the Second Level of Hell!

The wretched King Minos has decided your fate. His tale wraps around his body 2 times; The sweet light no longer strikes against your eyes. Your shade has been banished to… the Second Level of Hell! Second Level of Hell: You have come to a place mute of all light, where the wind bellows as the sea does in a tempest. This is the realm where the lustful spend eternity. Here, sinners are blown around endlessly by the unforgiving winds of unquenchable desire as punishment for their transgressions. The infernal hurricane that never rests hurtles the spirits onward in its rapine, whirling them round, and smiting, it molests them. You have betrayed reason at the behest of your appetite for pleasure, and so here you are doomed to remain. Cleopatra and Helen of Troy are two that share in your fate.

Here is how you matched up against all the levels:

What sent me to Level2? I took another test to find out…

Shocking results?

Your Sins are Revealed, Your Fate is Sealed

Your sin has been measured. You have committed many sins, but Lust is the mortal sin that has done you in. Just below, discover your full sinful breakdown and learn what it is about you that codemns you to hell.

(Personally I’d've thought my pride was higher than that…)

How appropriate that I land in Second Level: Lust, don’t you agree? And since it *is* Thursday, it is time for an HNT shot, and, huh, wudd’yaknow…it’s HellFire themed! Hehe! Below is today’s shot: a shot of my new ear-wrap and my red hair.

Now, before you all get upset about my hair, let me say this: it was orange when I first dyed it, but I’ve been using Pantene ProV Red Expressions, which has honestly deepened the color…something I was hoping for. It’s nowhere near the dark velvet red I would like, but it will work for now.

Especially since it’s decent enough to pass for Hell’s Belle red.

Hell’s Belles
Hell’s Belles know no bounds
Their voices carry on the winds
Singing softly in men’s ears

Hell’s Belles win again
Their triumph flies through the air
Gliding silenty though the clouds
Dragging the wails of captive men
Growing ever more grand and bold
Swimming the skies of red and gold